Dreams

I dreamt my beautiful flat had become so disgusting that there was an expansive ecosystem living the fetid piles of filth. Spiders would grow so fat that their yellow-and-black striped abdomens would burst and hang in tatters as they scrambled through the layers of pee-soaked rugs and discarded fast food wrappers. The cats staged a protest and dragged their overflowing litter boxes into the living room, which they had politely covered with towels to minimize offense to their delicate, wrinkled noses. Frogs would rape each other in the laundry room amongst cat litter spills and heaps of unwashed towels. Everywhere except the children's table, which was sparkling clean but set in the middle of the living room where it did not maximize space. The first thing I did was move it in front of the windows…

…and the whole problem was that I was actually in California, visiting my boyfriend, and was supposed to be in Barnaby, working on a series of short films, and was so scatterbrained that I had left half my luggage at the airport and wouldn't return their calls. When I went to McDonald's, I'd frequently steal my food, not because I was immoral, but because I'd forget that you had to pay for things.

But all of that was done now. Enough was enough. (The poor kitties, dealing with rapist frogs and exploding spiders and who knows what else.) I was going to clean my house, and I was going to clean it now.